MandatoryPositive

  WRITING PROMPT: Write about something that was hidden in plain sight. Did other people notice it? Was it significant to someone else?  Through a series of unfortunate events, my mom lost most of her stuff. I won’t go into why, mainly because it’s no one’s business, and partially because I always feel bad that I didn’t do more.  I always tried to tell her that it was just “stuff” and it wasn’t important. I was trying to make her feel better, but I’m pissed off at myself for ever saying that. It was HER stuff and she was hurt.  In particular, she wanted these brass elephant book ends and blue floral lamp.  Oddly, I couldn’t for the life of me remember these items. I think it annoyed her when I said that. She would often reply “yes you do!”   Apparently these lamps and bookends were significant. They had made it through several redecorations and she loved them.  She had a sad look whenever she spoke of them.   Today while looking through old photos...

  After spending most of my day working on something I’ll call “The Legacy Project” I am feeling particularly sentimental. Pouring over the photos of relatives I’ve lost and some I never even met. I have scanned, cropped and uploaded until my vision became blurry,  and I’m not done. I’m grateful I’m not done because to be done, means I have no more. Each piece has brought me a little joy, so naturally I WANT MORE!  I am swimming in memories and emotions-the good kind,  and my heart is full-which is very rare these days.  I am supposed to be reviewing grants, but I took a break to heat up a bowl of collard greens. I once again made them how I like them- with double the smoked Turkey necks so they’re a main, not side dish.  I used to always tell mom I was going to do that. She scoffed at the notion, so I never did, until this past year. My ancestors are standing together shaking their heads that I had the NERVE to once again make greens with no cornbread in a...

                  I always loved tulips. My grandma used to have pink tulips that came up every year. I said I would have them someday if I ever bought a house.  I’m no green thumb, but I love that once you plant tulips, they come back every year.   When we bought this house,  it was supposed to be a part of the less than five-year plan. We were going to have fun renovating-painting, laying new flooring. I like adventure and wanted to learn new things.  I spent hours looking through magazines and websites trying to figure out the things I wanted. A house full of color and interesting eclectic pieces.  I imagined we’d travel and I’d find little trinkets along the way.  That life didn’t get to happen. It turns out, somehow I married someone who didn’t share my vision-or really care to even know what it was. I’d come home and randomly something would be painted with colors I never chose. Flooring was half-assed put ...

  WEEK 10 WRITING PROMPT:  Think about your dream vacation. Where would you go? What would you do there? I generally have dreams of tropical vacations. Oceans with waves crashing into waves, my feet gently caressing the sand.  Sun, lots of sun. I want to parasail or get on one of the paddle boats, and end the day exhausted and happy from all of the fun activities. I imagine swimming with the dolphins-which I have never done, and going on adventure experiences, like exploring caves or late night luau’s that include the ceremonial lighting of the tiki torches. Hawaii, Jamaica, it doesn’t matter. Someplace with tropical weather and a nice hotel that has unlimited drinks with fancy umbrellas. That has always been a part of my ideal vacation.  Things are different now. I am different. I would definitely take the tropical experience, but lately I find myself wanting something less conventional. A quiet get away without well-crafted plans. Maybe a notebook and a pen and fre...

  In my lifetime I have made many mistakes. I spoke when I should have stayed silent, I have surrendered when I should have fought, and argued when I should have just walked away.  I have been humiliated, downtrodden, depressed and empty. There have been days in all these years that it took every fiber of my being just to find the will to stay in the world.  I’m sure there  are many people in this world I owe an apology to, but today I’m focusing on one. I owe MYSELF a huge apology for so many things.   I am sorry for letting people mispronounce and misspell your name. You hated it and all the nicknames they tried to give you. It’s ok to correct them. ITS YOUR NAME. I will correct them EVERY time from now on. If they care, they will learn, if they don’t, then I will kindly tell them to keep their attempt at your name out of their mouth!  I am sorry for not telling your teacher in the 3rd grade that YES, you shriveled up cow, there are such a thing as BLACK ...

  WRITING PROMPT WEEK 8: Think about someone you've lost. If you could ask them anything right now, what would it be?   In my lifetime I have lost many people close to me. My grandmother, my mother, several aunts and uncles, a few friends, and even a baby during my sixth month of pregnancy.  I know loss. I often day dream about what life would be life if these people would still be here. Would I have had the courage to step out on faith and I try the new things I’ve tried? Would I have shared grief and encouraged others to share? Would I have checked in with people who’ve lost their mothers, if I wouldn’t have lost my own? When my mom was dying, we had many conversations about all kinds of things. Some of them gave me hope, and some of them broke my heart. I feel like I didn’t truly get to know her for all she was until she broke down some things in her life that she never planned to share. It told me so much about her. A part of me will forever be sad that I didn’t get...